How To Manage Children's Electronic Usage

By Michael D. Zito, Ph.D.

One of the most common complaints and frustrations I hear from parents is the management of electronic usage by their children. When parents try to set limits, they are often met with resistance (‘one more minute”) and emotional reactivity (“If I stop now, I'll lose my best score ever”). Despite children's resistance, parents need to set effective limits on usage because overuse can negatively affect cognitive and language development, mental and emotional health, physical health, and social skill development. A key element to realize is that electronic games and devices flood the brain with dopamine, creating a highly rewarding experience that makes it difficult for children to stop usage. Maintaining a healthy balance between online and offline activities and being aware of time spent on devices is critical to ensuring a healthy interaction with technology.

Here are some strategies

• If you want your children to learn how to manage their usage, start by managing yours.
• Gain control of all electronic devices, including smartphones, by using available Parental Control Apps through your service providers. This makes monitoring usage more manageable.
• Understand that your child will be upset by limit setting, but one of the many signs of being a good parent is being willing to set limits on your children, despite their displeasure with it. Their self-esteem will not be hurt as many parents fear.
• Establish screen-free zones, such as bedrooms and the dinner table.
• Limit access to electronic devices at least 30 minutes before bedtime since the light from these devices can inhibit sleep by blocking melatonin release. Good sleep promotes good cognitive, academic, emotional and physical abilities.
• Encourage family group activities that do not involve electronics. This could include physical and social activities.
• Help your children discover non-electronic hobbies such as sports, performing arts and outdoor activities.
• In a developmentally appropriate way, educate your children about the pros and cons of electronic usage. Given reasonable usage, the pros could include healthy, enjoyable distractions as well as educational opportunities available on devices. The cons could include negative effects on attention span, risk of low physical activity, eye strain, neck posture problems, weakened social skills, and empathy towards others. When social media is included, the cons can include increased anxiety, depression, mood instability, and stress due to potential social media comparisons and cyberbullying.
• Talk with your children about how you, as a parent, actively set limits on your own electronic use and the reasons for it. This will model good decision-making for your children.

Michael D. Zito, Ph.D. is a licensed psychologist (#3599) with offices in Warren and Morristown. He practices clinical and sport psychology with children through adults and can be reached at MichaelZitoPhD@yahoo.com Dr. Zito welcomes your questions and ideas for future articles.